Friday, February 18, 2011

STOLEN: 50 Things I wish I wouldn't do

50.I wish I wouldn't be so indecisive about my hair. Long, short, its just fucking hair.
49.I wish I wouldn't J walk so aimlessly.
48. I wish I wouldn't be so mean to my guy friends that have feelings for me. I should have said something soon, but I guess I am cowardly and selfish and don't want to lose their friendship, no matter how hard it is on them.
47. I wish I didn't want bigger boobs. but I really do.
46. I wish I wouldn't get so emotional when I get mad. And I cry when I am mad. Not sad, but mad.
45. I wish I wouldn't feel homesick in Toronto
44.I wish I wouldn't be so insistent that my brother and I were closer.
43.I wish I wouldn't sound so loud when I blow my nose.
42. I wish I wouldn't let my jealous insecurities from my X wear off on me in such a big way.
41. I wish I wouldn't smoke.
40. I wish I wouldn't talk so much when I am nervous/drunk/high.
39. I wish I wouldn't be so lazy about seeing my grandparents.
38. I wish I wouldn't write so little.
37. I wish I wouldn't always be referred to as cute.
36. I wish I wouldn't push men away.
35. I wish I wouldn't put the guys I am dating through so much to get closer to me.
34. I wish I would learn to take a chance on the guys I am friends with that want to have more romantic relations with me.
33. I wish I wouldn't have romantic relations with people that don't mean as much.
32. I wish I wouldn't remember 85% of the dreams I have.
31. I wish I wouldn't put so much merit on the dreams I have. And let them CREEP me out.
30. I wish I wouldn't let other people's happiness come before mine so often.
29. I wish I wouldn't over think, over analyze, over compensate, over dramatize and let my head get in the way.
28. I wish I wouldn't miss some people I have shut out so much. Or regret doing it.
27. I wish I wouldn't allow myself to feel as much regret as I do.
26. I wish I wouldn't miss him.
25. I wish I wouldn't want to spend more time with my brother. I think its smothering.
24. I wish I wouldn't enjoy so many cheesy TV shows.
23. I wish I could focus on my writing the way I seem to focus on making the people around me content.
22. I wish I wouldn't go out when I really should or want to stay in. There is something about staying home on when EVERYONE else is going and knowing that you will have a better time on the couch that leaves me unsettled. It seems daunting and scary, like I am going to miss out on something. Though when I do go out, I never seem to find that something I am so afraid of missing.
21. I wish I wouldn't be so anxious about losing my family. I wish that I could accept that people leave and and go and that life goes on. Even writing that makes it scary.
20. I wish I wouldn't find anywhere but here home.
19. I wish I wouldn't feel like my emotional range goes from my heart all the way to the moon.
18. I wish I wouldn't want people that I can't have.
17. I wish I wouldn't want kids so badly. Its weird. But they seem like fun.
16. I wish I wouldn't suck so greatly at relationships. Sometimes I sabotage them, sometimes I run from them, sometimes they don't want me either. But I can't seem t get any of it right.
15. I wish I wouldn't have this hope in the back of my mind that I have already met this one great love we might experience.
14. I wish I wouldn't be so frivolous with money.
13. I wish I wouldn't spill my guts to strangers every time I get high.
12. I wish I wouldn't crave some validation from my co workers so much.
11. I wish I wouldn't hate my hair always.
10. I wish I wouldn't make things so difficult for my mom.
9. I wish I wouldn't be so scared of riding a bike.
8. I wish I wouldn't spend so much time on Facebook.
7. I wish I didn't read so much garbage on the internet. Or spend so much time on it.
6. I wish I wouldn't be so afraid to invest in something good. On all accounts.
5. I wish I wouldn't wonder where it all went wrong with the guys I thought were right. I wish I didn't wonder, but I always do.
4. I wish I wouldn't smoke.
3. I wish I wouldn't doubt myself when it comes to work.
2. I wish I wouldn't put so much faith in everyone I meet, right off the bat.
1. I wish I wouldn't want to change so many things about myself because of how others make me feel.


Steph said...

Lady you nailed it on So. Many. Levels. For a second there, I almost thought you were talking about me.

You know what? I'm going to steal this too :)

Thank you!

PS. I think you're a sexy bitch! Fuck cute! I thought of you today when I was in Winner's searching for a cute pair of rubber boots (that I didn't find of course) and spotted the most adorable Steve Madden shoes and thought to myself, Lyndsay would totally approve :)

Lindsay Woo said...

hey stephie!!!! Hope you are amazing pretty lady. I think its one of the most therapeutic things.
I am seriously ready for it to be nice out.

Thanks for reading and commenting. That makes my day.

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