Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Max and Mary, UP!


Lately it seems I have been straying, ever so slightly, from my usual taste of gore and horror, being drawn into these heartfelt adult cartoons. They have got me hooked; for a long time it seemed like the only way for me to deal with my own emotion was to watch something sad when my own emotion got to be too much. That way, when I cried over a sad movie, it was much easier to let go and feel a little better about, instead of feeling guilty for the tears.

Max and Mary and UP have both evoked very strange emotions, UP stirring the feeling of wanting to grow old with someone and coming to terms with maybe having a cool life partner, but more that life will go one and you can have pleasure in so many other things regardless of what that means or who that "partner" ends up being.

Sometimes it is tough being so far away from where I would like to be. But it doesn't mean that I haven't grown so far away from where I was when I first moved to Montreal. School is coming to some form of an end and a new chapter is starting. It seems cliche but maybe I will get the chance to write about something other that culture and myself and delve into the world of politics and the environment for a chance of pace(and climate). But for now, I need to make it through this week, this semester and Christmas, with Cuba as a light at the end of the tunnel shining some sunny skies onto the new year.

A lot of interesting things have happened this week, with school coming to an end. My favorite being the first snowfall, beautiful and powdery. There is something about the first fluffy snowfall that makes me want this perfect person to share the moment with, on top of a building or in an empty park with no footprints made in the fresh blanket of snow. Cold noses, warm hands and a winter kiss seems like the perfect remedy to this strange, useless feeling that I have had lately.

After the relationships, or lack there of, that I have experienced in the last year, I have learned a lot about myself, but at the same time I think I have more questions than answers. Often I am left wondering why it is that it seems people don't want to know about me or my adventures? What are they thinking in the meantime, if they are not going to bother to know me or much about me? Is it them or have I just become closed off to the point that people don't even want to bother? Maybe this new year will bring some more answers with some time spent alone, outside of school.

The end seems so far away, but as Max puts it, "I hope our sidewalks can meet one day and we can share a can of condensed milk."

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Ride, Ride, Riding along.

FINAL WEEK OF CLASSES! Jesus, this has been a hard semester. When I got back from France I was SO excited to get over the SHITTINESS that Toronto exuded on my general being this summer. Blogging has been the last thing on my mind, between wasting my time on useless beings, writing for www.soundonsight.org, attempting to write for the Montreal Mirror, working and going to school has almost killed me. Oh yeah, I have a room mate now too!!!

It has been insanity. Being in France doesn't seem so long ago; the semester flew by. Luckily my summer malfunctions weren't carried on to Nice and I was able to take time for myself and my best gal buddies while I was in France. Unfortunately, because I left my problems at the door in TO, they were waiting for me when I got home. To the point, where they liked me so much they followed me to Montreal, then kicked my ass repeatedly.

Now that its december, I would like to think that I have learned my lesson. Sort of. As of this month, it is time to remind myself that it is not Douchember, so maybe keeping myself away from the dudes will work a bit better.

On the side note, school is done, I have gone on some wicked adventuring in the past few months, cooked a friggin amazing turkey named Murray and haven't been to TO since I left. its been DAMN good actually. I have also checked some super fantastic shows out, which I normally don't make time for, but have made a point of doing more.

Also checking out more good movies than you can shake a stick at, which is always fantastic in my opinion. Dressed up as Andrew WK for Halloween, which was uneventful, turned 23 and got a fab gift and birthday with my best ladies in the world.

Had some dude say "That'll do pig," after we boned... yup. You got it, that came out of his mouth. Thinking he was refrencing Zombieland? I don't know which pisses me off more, the improper reference or the comment itself. This is why its time to take a back seat from putting myself out there, because the only people interested are shitty ones it seems.



The list of "do nots" is becoming epic.

1. hockey players
2. dudes that play music
3. frat boy types

i think that is it for now, though I am sure that I will close myself off to another stereotype by the time I get back from Cuba in January. Big fun. My cousin that is the raddest dude ever is coming back from Saskatoon tonight and going to be in TO when I get back, which is fantastic and exciting because he has been gone forever and I missed him alot. That's all I got for the moment, i'm going to try and keep better tabs on this thing now that i'm DONE SCHOOL?! oh yeah, thats effing wicked too.